A year late but still putting it out here so I can have something to look back on. That is if I keep writing. I don’t think I’ll ever stop but we’ll see.Continue reading →
Exactly one year ago today, I remember walking down the aisle at a beautiful garden surrounded with the people we love. It was quite a gloomy day and the rain had just stopped pouring. I remember waiting inside the bridal car alone wondering what’s happening at the venue because there was some kind of a delay for a few minutes. I also remember not stressing about it, which was surprising for a bride who went through so much months and days before the wedding. I remember praying that however the wedding goes, I will stay happy. And so I did.
A couple of days ago, I rewatched our wedding videos and browsed the photos. I was smiling alone because I saw myself looking very happy on that day. It only goes to show that I married the right one. I have attended countless weddings and I don’t understand why 99% of the brides never smile during the march. They may be feeling nervous and holding back their tears to not ruin their makeup, can’t blame them for those reasons but I did not want to look any of those brides. I remember just smiling and waiving at the guests while I marched. I was just too excited to see my groom and when I did, my heart just melted. I couldn’t wait to be officially married.
Earlier this year, my husband and I talked about where to spend our long-overdue honeymoon but we didn’t get the chance to. We got too busy with work and moving in and out from one place to another due to so many reasons. Then we found out we were expecting 7 months after the wedding. We then decided to just celebrate our first wedding anniversary abroad. We initially planned to go to South Korea, Japan, or France but guess what, we have been blessed to be given the opportunity to migrate here in the Netherlands just a few weeks ago. So now, we’re in Europe and we’ll celebrate our anniversary in another country this weekend. Can you even imagine my excitement? Of course I have already prepared my outfits two days ago.Continue reading →
It is Sunday and I am all alone in the house. Reminds me of my weekends about ten years ago when I preferred staying at home, folding my clothes, creating some artworks, and blogging through my old crappy laptop. I really don’t like noisy environment where I couldn’t hear the movie I’m watching. It annoys me. The night shift work really suits me well because I can focus more when the silence is deafening.
My husband has left this afternoon to run some errands. I was supposed to come with him but I woke up tired and I didn’t really feel like going out today. I think I need another massage. Just about a few days ago, we went to a spa and treated ourselves for a long-overdue whole body massage. It was so good that I just wanted to fall asleep there. Also, we had a spontaneous date on Sunday evening after dinner. Went to one of our fave cafés and ordered something unusual. It was the only café opened in the area because it was already past ten in the evening. It was unwinding even if we only stayed for a couple of minutes.
Last month at around third week of November, I flew to Manila alone for a couple of days and spent some time with my workmates who I haven’t seen in a while. Then I slept over at my friend’s/workmates’s for two nights. It was a little far from the city so it was like road-tripping for a bit. But my husband-free days didn’t end there. I went to another town to visit my cousins and spent hours and hours talking about beauty tips and skincare routine.
It was when I went back to our condo that I realized I needed that vacation with people other than my family and husband. Before we got married, I asked AJ to not see me for a month because I wanted to spend some me-time, but it didn’t happen because three months before our wedding was the busiest days of our life. It was almost impossible to chill and take a break for a day.
I am so used to living independently that I missed it when I lived with AJ during the pandemic because we see each other 24/7, even more when we got married. Not that I don’t like being with him all the time, but there are days when I just want to be alone or spend some time with my family or friends and I’m glad my husband has no issues with that. I allow him to do the same, too.
Now it’s past 6 PM and I have to prepare for dinner. I thawed the bacon and will cook rice after I post this blog. Ok bye for now. The husband is home.
It has been almost 3 months since I got married. I was supposed to blog about our wedding preps, wedding tips, and whatnots. But I was so swamped since the start of the year. I have a full-time job that pays me and had a full-time wedding planning for months that took my money away. Two things that have opposite effects on my bank accounts.
I got a little time today so I decided to start writing about our wedding. This time, it’s gonna be all about the traditions that we intentionally skipped. While our parents are very traditional, AJ and I are very unorthodox and quite contemporary. We are both typical Taurus. So you know, both stubborn. Before we started our wedding preps, there were two conditions I asked him: no acceptance of single penny from our families or friends before the wedding and no debts after the wedding. Well, it’s not that I didn’t want help from anyone, but my point was that we both wanted to get married so we should have thought about financial readiness. I am not against people who willingly accept help or assistance from their loved ones or parents who insist on paying for the celebration, but I am just different. I wanted us to spend our own money so our parents would know that we are ready for marriage – financially, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. Another thing was that I didn’t want any unsolicited suggestions. We all know that the tendency when someone offers help is that they think they have the right to suggest anything. My bride moment would flip out if that happens to me. I am very lucky that AJ supported my decisions and just wanted me to give the wedding of my dreams, which almost didn’t happen mainly because of the pandemic.
Now here goes the list of wedding traditions that we intentionally skipped/broke:Continue reading →
And just like that, we’re capping off 2020 in a few hours.Continue reading →
Fourteenth of August 2020. It was a Friday night and I was about to start my shift. On most days, I am cranky on the first few minutes after I wake up but at that night I was exceptionally not. I even helped him in the kitchen reheating the food for our dinner. We don’t usually eat together on working days because we have a totally opposite shift. But the universe was very supportive of his plan. My meetings were miraculously canceled so we got to have dinner together. I knew there was something going on because prior to that day, he kept asking me what I wanted to eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. He knows I only eat twice a day, sometimes even just once.Continue reading →
It has been more than a year since I moved in here in the capital city and I tell you, there are so many changes in my life.
You know, when I started writing, I never really expected someone to read my stories. I don’t have a lot of friends to talk to, so maybe that is why I pour all of my thoughts into written words. I keep a blog because I want to look back on my stories one day and reminisce what I’ve been through, then laugh it off.
Anyway, I got another breaking news. I have a new job now. I left my previous company due to circumstances I don’t want to share yet. Whenever someone asks me how’s my current job, I always say that I am happy, associated with a genuine smile. I really am. I felt like I found myself again. I can joke around with my colleagues, I eat with them, I share my personal stories, I can be myself with them. Those are just the few things I missed. And can I just say that my boss is one of the best? I mean, I couldn’t point out a single thing to complain about him. I’m not even kidding.
At first, I was so hesitant to push through my application for this job because I will be working on a night shift. Little did I know, it suits my lifestyle perfectly because I have insomnia for about 3 years now. Thank God for that one friend of mine who forced me to just try to apply for this job. No regrets. Can’t sleep at night? Might as well get paid for it.
So, I am now an addition to the population of commuters. I take two rides back and forth. I have learned to memorize the bus routes and where to hail a jeepney. Most of the time, I run to catch the bus only to miss it in a couple of seconds. I have mastered the art of balancing when I don’t get to sit in the bus and have nowhere and no one to hold. I can manage to watch KDrama just standing or leaning onto the vertical handrail. Sometimes, someone would offer me a seat which made me believe that chivalry’s not dead, just yet. On some days, I would look at the people’s outfits and give them a free makeover in my imagination. When I don’t feel like observing the people around me, I watch the KDrama someone sitting beside me is watching. Or I peek at a teenager’s phone while she stalks someone on Twitter. The things I do to keep me entertained for the whole trip.
I used to hate mornings but now I enjoy my early morning walks. The birds chipping and the cold breeze that blows my hair remind me that I am almost home and that life is good.
It is now five in the morning. I am wide awake and in my pyjamas and hoodie. My stomach is growling though I’ve had my dinner at 12 midnight. I’m gonna wrap up this post now and maybe read a book to help me fall asleep. But most probably it will only keep me up. We’ll see.
Time check. It’s 26 minutes after 1 AM. I still have a work later cause apparently, it is still not a Friday night. But I still decided to pull out my laptop and now I am gonna start telling you stories you didn’t even asked to hear in the first place.
As I walked home this evening, I decided to pass by Bonifacio High Street. I don’t usually take this route cause I think it would take me longer to get home or I’m just bad at calculating the distance. Anyway, I was recording my feet while walking and was surprised to see some petals of white roses scattered. At first I thought they were just leaves falling from the tree but then I realized they were perfectly sprinkled at the sides of the stairs I was stepping on to. It looked like something you see during weddings and proposals where the lady walks down the aisle, eyes filled with tears of joy, and covering her mouth with both hands to look cute. You know what I mean. So I looked around and saw candles which I believed was formed into a heart shape and there were some video cameras being set up. I knew it. Someone was proposing in public. I stayed for a while. Thought I’d be an additional audience but when I looked back at the petals on the ground, the utility guy was already sweeping them off. So I thought the proposal has ended. I just hope she said “YES”.
I continued to walk my way home and reminisce the times when I wished someone would ask me to marry him one day and surprise me like that in public. I realized that I no longer want that, although I know my current boyfriend is capable of doing that. I bet he’d rent a whole cinema or take me on a helicopter ride. Or whatever crazy idea that he thinks is fancy. AJ, if you are reading this, I forbid you to do that. I am over those years. Long before we started dating, my fairytale dreams have changed. I have come to appreciate the simpler life. The more I get older, the more chill and private I want my life to be. I like intimate weddings, small gatherings, being surrounded by nature, and just staying at home most of the time.
Honestly, I don’t have that big circle of friends. I have a few close friends and I like it that way. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I am not a snob and in situations where I am surrounded by strangers, I am usually the one who would approach people first. I don’t really go out of the house very often, even when I was still in Cebu. You barely see me to the point that our neighbors would ask my mother if I am still living in our house or have I moved out already. Some people might think I’m dead already. I don’t go to bars and clubs. And most of all, I don’t drink and smoke cigar. You think I am a party-goer because I live in the middle of the city where night clubs are just four cartwheels away. Look, I wouldn’t even show up when our neighbor living next to our house invites me over on occasions. Do I sound like a wet-blanket now? Well, in my defense, I am not comfortable eating at somebody else’s place because one, it would take me at least an hour to finish my meal; and two, I am too lazy to mingle with people. I know it’s not a good thing for some of you, but in our family, we don’t normally eat together. I always prefer to eat alone. And that’s never been a problem with my parents. The most valid reason I can give you is that I don’t eat on time. Also, when I don’t feel like eating yet, nobody can force me. I like to do things in my own time. Okay, let’s just stop talking about food. My stomach is growling. I wonder why when I was so full at dinner.
Where were we? Oh, I watched a movie prior to writing this. I found “Falling Inn Love” at Netflix. Turns out it was the one I have waited. Seen the trailer of it a couple of times maybe months ago. Remember how I kept saying in my previous posts that I’ve been looking for films similar to Letters to Juliet and Under the Tuscan Sun? Well guess what, the storyline of this movie is a combination of the two aforementioned films. It is about a career woman, probably my age, who lost her job and her boyfriend in a span of one week. She was devastated and during her misery, she stumbled upon this email where she won an “Inn” at a countryside in New Zealand. She then fell in love with a man who help her rebuild the inn, which by the way happens to be a scam. It was like ordering an item from an online shop. You expect the exact item to arrive only to disappoint you to the superlative degree you could ever imagine. I wouldn’t go into so much details so you would watch it, too.
The more I watch films with beautiful countryside setting, the more I want to move away from the city. I could be working in a flower shop there or in a café waiting tables. I could be an editor on a local newspaper where I just write anything under the sun. I could be an event coordinator, as what I have always dreamt of. I’d be greeting my neighbors good morning and we see each other in church on Sundays. In this life, I know how to ride a bike with a basket at the front full with fresh flowers I picked from my garden. I have a vintage van painted in a dusty blue color with white accents. Or a pink vespa that I ride going to my boutique at the small town where I sell cheap cute clothings and accessories and some decors I have personally made. I would cook delicious meals and go to farmer’s market on Saturdays. I would have a dog that I gifted to AJ but stays with me so he can use the dog as a reason to visit me more often. He also has to come by everyday because I can’t feed the dog. FYI, I have a doraphobia (kindly refer to google for an brief description). I don’t know why we’re still not married and living together at this point. But anyway, this is my dream life. Might change after a few years. Hopefully not.
Time check once again. it’4 minutes after 3. Expect me to wake up at around noon time. I’ll hit the sack now before the sun rises.